Dear Supreme Commander (Gregg Bagni Alien Truth),
Thank your for sending me to live with the humans of Clear Water Outdoor. I prefer this method of study to our archaic probing methods. Recently they took me on a trip to the Apostle Islands National Lakeshore. I am puzzled why they chose to travel by kayak with human power as the means of propulsion. It is so primitive.
Thankfully I did not have to paddle any of the nearly 40 miles we explored. Nonetheless we managed to survive the cold waters of Lake Superior quite well. I was able to offer some assistance with navigation even though they use 2 dimensional maps. The beaches were spectacular and the water more clear than the Galactican Nebula in February. They gave me the name “Green Dude” because they cannot pronounce Zorgathlogintgork.
I learned how the humans sleep in the backcountry, though I chose to sleep inside some NRS Water Shoes because of the strange noises humanoid males make while sleeping.
I also learned of their strange choice of diet. They introduced me to something they called “PBR”? It has a funny taste but an interesting side effect. This elixir made it possible for me to communicate with other species on Earth. I particularly enjoyed my conversation with the Lady Bugs, funny little creatures.
I woke up later and the humans had buried me in the sand with only my cranium sticking out. They shaped the sand into a female humanoid body. I did not see the humor in this, or the rinse in the 48degree lake water.
Overall I would say my experience with them has been very insightful. The one called “Cory” is particularly interesting. I wonder if perhaps he has some mutations in his DNA.
Until next time,